okay this is gonna sound weird but bear with me for a second
a couple months ago my friend told me about something called “lesbian sheep syndrome.” when sheep mate, all the female sheep has to do is stand there and the male sheep will take the initiative. but when two female sheep want to bang (and yes, lesbian sheep exist) they just sidle up to each other and wait because neither of them know what to do
lesbian humans do the same fucking thing. as women we are conditioned not to seek out relationships because it’s the men’s job to pursue us. we are actively discouraged from participating in our own romance. so when two women like each other, there’s this weird stand off because neither of them know how to proceed. add our internalized homophobia to the mix and it’s nearly impossible for us to find relationships without going through a significant amount of mutual pining and emotional distress first
the whole point of this is i know it’s intimidating to talk to someone new, especially a pretty girl, but you’ve gotta make a move! you can’t be a lesbian sheep!
I’m dead at his face in the last one like “Did you even try?”
And then when he gets pushed he’s like “Wait no let him try!”
his composure is just everything I aspire to be
OMG IT’S BACK!
CHARLES IS THE BEST OMG
Like how he stands there as if, “Okay, I’ll be perfectly still and we’ll see if you can hit me this time. Come on, it is like I’m giving you a head start.” He’s more annoyed with his cuff link than the wanna be assassin.
FOREVER REBLOGGING THIS.
THIS is how you deal with terrorists
Even if you go down you did it with dignity.
You all do know who his mother is right? You know the woman who stayed home during the bombing of London and drove Jeeps in WW2. They are trained to be final boss overlord level composed at age 2.
U don’t fuck with the Queen
His sister, Princess Anne, was the victim of an attempted kidnapping. The guy pointed a gun at her and told her to get out her car. She replied: “Not bloody likely.” And tried to kick him.
trump: *pulls out of the paris agreement, severely harming the current global efforts to combat global warming because he’s either too fucking stupid or too evil to see that it’s a big deal and also starts the process of wiping out net neutrality, an objectively horrible thing for everone that isn’t a massive telecom company executive and will cause untold levels of damage on our ability to communicate through the internet*
media:
trump: *makes a spelling mistake on twitter*
media:OMG have you heard of
COVFEFE??????????????????????????????
look i really hate to be that person who takes anything seriously on this hellsite but i’ve had it up to about here with the “trump is an evil mastermind distracting us from the real problems instead of an unstable, senile old man with a tenuous grip on reality” conspiracy theories so i’ve just gotta do it today
too tired already to get into the net neutrality issue too but the point is: if you’re getting all your news from twitter memes, of course you’ve heard more about covfefe than actual policy, but the root of the matter isn’t that journalists aren’t doing their jobs and reporting on the real issues, it’s that you’re getting all your news from twitter memes
You know when you just see a girl and think you have witnessed an Angel and start to actually think about the possibility of God because holy Jesus macaroni she is beautiful
